An Option For The First Dance

We are planning to have a very formal romantic wedding, but there is just one problem. The first dance. We both are very shy people and do not want to be in the spotlight all by ourselves at our reception. Are there any other options to the first dance?

I know that a number of brides feel as you do. One way to solve the situation gracefully is to have the longest married couple, such as grandparents, invited up to dance and congratulated on their enduring and happy marriage. Then other significant family members with long marriages would be announced and invited to the dance floor. As a finale, you and your new husband would be introduced to celebrate your first dance as a married couple. This would take the pressure off of you and honor those that you love.

Photography by The Luxurious Wedding Photography Team.

"How Did You Find Me?" Vendor Question Annoys Bride

"I am in the middle of selecting my vendors and I noticed that everyone was asking me how I found them. I have been answering 'I'm not sure' because this question annoys me and makes me feel uncomfortable. A friend said I should tell them, so I was wondering what is the right thing to do?"

Actually this is a good question but I can see why you might feel put on the spot. Do you really need to give out this information?

When you are trying on a wedding dress, asking for an opinion seems natural and you expect honest feedback.
How you use this information is your choice, but the opinion of others matter to you and may shape your decision.

I respect how hard wedding vendors work to deliver a quality product to brides. They are honest professionals who often put family and friends aside to go the extra mile to make a bride happy.

In your quest to find the perfect vendor, they are also looking for the bride who is a good fit for them. Feedback is as essential to them as it is for you. So when asked, be specific. Say, "I found you on Luxurious Wedding" verses "I found you on the Internet".

Sophisticate vendors look to promote themselves in selective ways. They are relying on you to be the spokesperson for their marketing choices. Please take it as a compliment that they feel your input is of value.

Information on the Silver Heart Placecard Holder.

How To Become A Wedding Planner

'Whose Wedding Is It Anyway?', 'Married Away' and other wedding planning shows have brought the career of a wedding planner into focus. I have had many requests from brides who enjoyed the process of planning their own wedding. Enjoyed it so much that after the wedding they wanted to make a career change and become a wedding planner. In all cases, the brides mentioned how much 'fun' it would be.

Being in charge of all the details that go into a life changing event is fraught with perils. The total responsibility for the success of the wedding falls on the shoulders of the wedding planner. Anticipating potential problems and readjusting at the last second comes with experience.

While being a wedding planner can be viewed as fun it is, at the same time, a serious business. The 'fun' part comes when you are fulfilling your passion and delight.

What many fail to realize is that a career as a wedding planner is multi-dimensional. All of the parts have to come together in order to have a successful business such as:
A level of style, taste and vision
A desire to be 'of service' to your clients
A basic understanding of how to run a business
A sense of how to market and promote your business effectively

I asked Adrienne Meredith, the Publisher of Luxurious Wedding, to share her thoughts on getting started as a wedding planner:

"I always recommend starting with a job in the banquet planning department of the most luxurious hotel or venue in the area. Working in this type of a situation is an excellent way to learn how to deal with different personalities who are in the process of planning an event. It also provides insight into the timing, which is a critical element of wedding planning. It will give you first hand experience in working with vendors who are good/bad, what a planner contributes, and generally learn what a business is all about. If one is successful and feels that this is their true passion, they will have garnered a wealth of experience and established a reputation that can be used when opening a wedding planning business."

Photography by The Luxurious Wedding Photography Team.

Protocol for Rolling Out Aisle Runners

Aisle Runners have been used from the beginning of time and are steeped in folklore and mythology.

Long ago, when streets were unpaved and muddy, guests would arrive tracking dirt and mud into the church. Not wanting the bride to drag her hem along the grime, an aisle runner was laid down the pathway to the altar.

According to a Spiritual Myth, it was believed that evil spirits lurked beneath the earth’s surface. Fearing these spirits would rise up through the floor boards of the church, an aisle runner was placed upon the floor for the couple to walk on protecting them from those spirits. The white runner symbolized a pathway of purity.

Recently I was asked to explain the proper protocol for rolling out an aisle runner. Depending on the type and purpose of your aisle runner, the protocol will vary.
If you have chosen a custom hand painted aisle runner as part of your ceremony décor, your intention is to draw attention to the path you will walk down to take your vows. It is the focal point of your entrance, and should be unrolled and put in place after the floral decor is complete.

I recommend that you rope off your center aisle with beautiful satin ribbon or chiffon fabric and instruct your ushers to seat guests from the side aisles. After all, the center aisle should be sacrosanct for the bridal party only. Make sure your wedding photographer takes an image of it and don't forget to assign someone to roll it up and remove it. You want to make sure it gets safely delivered back to you.

A simple runner requires less organization. It should be placed in front of the ceremony site and should remain unrolled until all the close family members have been ushered to their seats. Once the mother of the bride has been escorted to her seat, no other guests may be seated using the center aisle. The runner should then be unrolled by an assigned ushers or groomsmen as an indication that the ceremony is about to begin. When the aisle runner has been unrolled to the entrance way, this could be the cue for the entrance music to begin.

8 Reasons To Hire A Wedding Planner

When you get engaged, you are faced with the desire to be involved with and remain in control all of the aspects of your wedding planning. Of course, this is your big day. The day that you will shine and be the center of your universe. You want the experience. You want the glory. But do you really want to experience the pressure and the headaches? Wedding planning is no easy task. It is a monumental effort to tie all the pieces together in a practical and visually beautiful timeline. It is stressful and it is painstakingly detailed.
The article, 8 Reasons To Hire A Wedding Planner outlines some of the reasons why every bride should be using a wedding planner. It may give you some insight into how a wedding planner is there to be a buffer and a fairy godmother to you. She will be the one to make sure all the proper protocol has been followed and she is the one who will be standing in the background at your wedding while your guests give you all the glory you deserve!

Wedding Website Protocol

Every modern bride today is spreading the good cheer and keeping their friends and family informed of the happy progression of their engagement by posting a Wedding Website.

This is the most effective way to provide pertinent information related to your wedding. Your guests will never have to wonder what is expected of them because you have defined all the details. If there are any questions a quick email to you should get them back on track and alert you to make that point clearer on your website. This is such an invaluable tool because it provides the ceremony and reception location and timeline. You will be able to suggest travel and hotel accommodations plus your gift registry choices will make everything so clear.

Guests of all ages will be reading your wedding website so let me share a few suggestions that will keep you on the etiquette track.

1. Be polite. Slang terms may be misunderstood by a different generation.

2. Make sure the website represents you as a couple by choosing a design layout that reflects your personalities. Designing it in the color tones you will be using in your wedding is a clever way of hinting at what is to come.

3. Keep it as well organized as possible making it user friendly.

4. Keep it “G-Rated" and simple. Please avoid the temptation to share any intimate details regarding your relationship. Even the first kiss, details of dates, and so on should be left out. Of course, everyone will be interested in the romantic time you met and your proposal. Just try to keep it focused on the nature of your relationship and the pending union.

5. Do not list your website on your wedding invitations. The best ways to inform guests of your Wedding Website is by word of mouth, listing it on your save-the-date card, the response card or map.

6. Electronic RSVP’s through your website is acceptable; however, it is still necessary to enclose a response card as part of your invitation suite. You may put a line on the bottom of your response cards to make your guests aware of this new option by simply stating: You may also RSVP through our wedding web site at: www.TheSmithNuptuals.com

7. Avoid putting a huge emphasis on your gift registries. Use tact and discretion when including links to your registry retailers.

8. Wedding Websites are informative and fun, but you must still send a wedding invitation via snail mail and include all pertinent information related to your wedding as there may be a few guests who are not online.

9. Don't stop at the wedding. Remember to use your Wedding Website to share the photographs from your Honeymoon. Many couples are opting to continue their wedding website to keep their extended families up to date with their new married life.

Create your luxurious wedding website and experiment with a free trial. These are classic and elegant wedding websites templates that Luxurious Wedding recommends.

Church Bell Chime Or A Blackberry ?

Let's face it. You, your friends and family are addicted to their Blackberry and there is no cure in sight.
Cell phones have become a necessary part of our lives. These precious little devices, which we live and breathe by, can alert us to their presence at the wrong time. Here are a few suggestions on how to avoid a cell phone mishap during your ceremony:

Print a matching reminder card and attach it to the outside of your ceremony program.

Post a pretty calligraphy sign on an easel at the church entrance reminding guests to turn off their phones.

Appoint one of your ushers to make an announcement to the waiting guests: “Guests of the Bride and Groom, the ceremony is about to begin. We ask that you kindly turn off your cell phones at this time.”

The biggest offenders may be your wedding party and family, who in the hustle and bustle of last minute hysteria, will not be reading the sign or the ceremony program. Have them check their phones with the wedding planner to avoid a disastrous interruption as you are about to say "I do".


Photography by The Luxurious Wedding Photography Team.

Who Will Walk You Down The Aisle?

In marriage, this is a tradition that was pretty much set in stone when families were a simple defined unit. The biological father always knew that this would be his pleasure one day. As family dynamics have changed we now have to meld the idea of tradition with the realities of our current lifestyle.

After all, this is 'your wedding' and rules can be broken. What we don't want to break is someone else's heart who may be dreadfully hurt by your decision. This is a time for happiness and creativity when it comes to applying etiquette and protocol.

Here are a few suggestions in order of preference:
Your biological father who has been dreaming of this day.
Both your father and your stepfather.
Your stepfather, if your biological father is not available.
A brother, significant family member or close friend.

A bride also has alternative options to walk alone, be escort by her mother or have both parents do the honors. Now here is where it can get tricky. It is not recommended that both parents escort the bride if they have been divorced and remarried. If they are divorced and have not been remarried, it may still be better for the bride to choose another option. Of course, this is where creativity comes into play. Innately you know what will feel right. Walking down the aisle is about making memories. Make sure your choices are created out of love, affection and sensitivity.

Photography by The Luxurious Wedding Photography Team.

Reception Seating For Wedding Party Guests

We are having a rather large wedding party and will be using a head table that includes the bride, groom and the entire wedding party. One of our groomsmen is bringing his long time girlfriend. She does not know anyone at the wedding and would like to sit close to her boyfriend. We have no idea where to seat her. What do you suggest?

When the wedding party is large consider using a U-shape table with the bride and groom seated at the center of the center table followed by the attendants seated with their husbands, wives, and significant others. One would never want to have a guest feel alone or out of place. So for wedding parties that are large, use round tables positioned next to each other. The bridal couple may be seated at their own table or with the Best Man, Maid of Honor and their respective partners while the other tables will play host to the remainder of the attendants each seated with their partners.

Photography by The Luxurious Wedding Photography Team.

Only Invited To The Ceremony?

Once upon a time, brides used two guest lists. One list was for those guests who were invited to the ceremony only. The other was for those guests invited to attend both the ceremony and the reception.

Inviting a large number of guests to the ceremony and only a selected few to the reception is no longer practiced nor considered proper etiquette. It is not prudent to send formal invitations to the wedding ceremony to all your guests while only a select group will be included in the reception festivities.

You should thoughtfully consider who you want your reception to include. Are you working within a budget that will accommodate everyone? If you don't want to cull your list then rethink what your options are for a reception. Switch from a formal sit down dinner to a more inventive theme that would still be elegant, yet satisfy both your budget and your guest list.

Letterpress Wedding Invitation by A Luxurious Wedding Invitation.

Coordinated Ceremony Seating

Provide specific and advanced instructions to your ushers for seating arrangements. This is especially important when you will have divorced family members in attendance. The parents of the bride are seated in the first pew on the left while the parents of the groom are seated in the first pew on the right. The immediate family follows in the pews behind the parents of the couple.

When parents are divorced, the bride’s mother (and step-father if remarried) will be seated in the first pew on left. Other members’ of the bride’s mother’s immediate family are seated directly behind her. This includes grandparents, aunts and uncles. However, they should not take up more than two pews. The bride’s father is seated in the next pew back, following the mother’s immediate family, with his wife and their family. The Grooms family follows the same scenario above. In the instance where the divorced family is amicable with one another and all are in agreement, both bride’s and groom’s parents may share their respective pew with stepparents.

Photography by The Luxurious Wedding Photography Team.

Reception Seating For The Bride & Groom

There are options when planning out the seating arrangement for you and your groom. You may choose to have a head table consisting of the bride, groom and attendants.
This table is typically a rectangular or U-shaped table. When the wedding party is large or you prefer to have attendants spouses or a significant other sit with them you may consider using two large round tables positioned next to each other. Then, the bridal couple can be seated at their own table or with the Best Man, Maid of Honor and their respective partners. Children or siblings of the couple may also sit with them.

Photography by The Luxurious Wedding Photography Team.

Reception Seating Plans

Reception seating can be a major challenge for most bridal couples as it requires strategic planning, deep thought, diplomacy, and humor. Your goal while working on your seating arrangements should be to make each table as sociable as possible. Mix and match each table while taking into consideration guests common interests, marital status and personalities.

Generally you have a parent table for the bride's family and one for the groom's side. Each of these tables should consist of their close family and friends. Some couples choose to have both sets of parents seated at one table. Although socially acceptable to seat parents in this manner, please take into account that each family brings its own set of close family and friends. In the instance of divorced parents, sit each parent at his/her own table and allow for each of them to host their own table with their family and friends.

Photography by Photography by The Luxurious Wedding Photography Team.